Why I’m proud to have been raised by a working mom
Having been raised by a working mom has opened my eye to many related issues and their impact on all the family members.
I have grown up seeing my mom juggle between work and family. It wasn’t easy at all. I have seen her come home late at night, only to put on her apron and cook dinner or wake up before sunrise to cook lunch for my brother and I. I have to admit that I didn’t know how hard that has been on her, or how beneficial having been raised by a working mom this has been until recently.
Growing up, I always wished my mom would be home after I come back from a long day at school. I wished I could wake up and have breakfast with her. Also, growing up without a sister, nights when I wished I could stay up chatting with my mom about things are endless. This was not, by any chance, easy for me.
But I have come to realize that better things were being planned for me, better aspects of my personality were being shaped in a healthier way.
I want to take this opportunity to talk about how I believe being the daughter of a working mother has made me who I am today. I have also tried to do a thorough research about the issue before writing this article, as I didn’t want it to be affected merely by personal experience and opinion; although I believe that’s what matters most at the end of the day.
The environment you grow up in, the status of your family in which you are raised and even the friends you make as you are maturing, all have an impact on how you think and how you act as an adult. Raised by working mothers, daughters rarely tend to grow up with the idea of stay-at-home mothers and often have very high career aspirations. As for sons, they also learn to take responsibility having both their parents absent by taking care of other members of the family, sharing chores and obligations. As children, both girls and boys, learn to be responsible when their parents are at work and learn how to take care of each other. Later, they grow up to have their sense of family, care and time management very well developed.
Confidence in children raised by working mothers is cultivated due to many reasons that include:
- Having to take responsibility of the house without the presence of parents, children learn to take decisions on their own. With time, this allows for self-confidence and assertiveness.
- For girls especially, watching their mother deal with customers and fellow colleagues improves communication and social skills and boosts self-confidence. After all, who do daughters imitate better than their own mothers? If she does it, so can they.
Both of the previous points also lead to developing courage in children. They grow to be decision makers and risk takers who can deal with different situations, foresee consequences and weigh results.
Living most of the time on their own, taking care of themselves and each other increases children’s independence and ability to be on their own. They find it easier to cope when leaving for college or moving out. They have already learned how to take care of a house, cook on their own and remember to turn the toaster off.
This doesn’t apply to all working mothers, but being an employee means changing positions, locations, traveling, etc.
Having to deal with these changes, children learn how to adapt. In fact, a lot of children of working parents (not only mothers) have changed schools and had to make new friends and a new life. Although, at the time this might seem like the hardest thing to do, and you start hating your parents for letting you go through this more than once, you will grow up to realize that this made you the strong person you are today. The person who can leave everything behind to start somewhere else, the person who makes friends wherever they go and the person who has learned to let go and move on.
Dedication and determination
How many times have I seen my mother come back from work exhausted, crying her eyes out, only to wake up the next morning, get dressed and go back to work with a smile on her face? Well, the answer is: countless.
Daughters rarely admit that their mothers are their role models but that doesn’t change the fact that 99% of the times they are. They become their mothers no matter how much they run away from that. Having a mother who is dedicated to her work just as much as she’s dedicated to her family will often lead to daughters who would do the same, thus making them more successful as moms first and second as working individuals. In fact, A. Bhattacharyat, in her article “Kids of working mothers are better off” for CNN Money mentions the following: “Daughters of working mothers earn 23% more than daughters of stay-at-home moms in the U.S., according to research by McGinn and others.”
I would like to end my post with a plea to all the working mothers out there. Please stop this feeling of guilt you keep carrying around, stop crying and stressing for leaving us and having to balance between work and family. We are proud of you more than you are of us. We are thankful for the individuals we have become and we are proud to say that you are our role models.